How to Make 5pm Feel Like the Start of Your Day
Turn the hours after work into the best part of your day.
I start my days early. I was never a morning person, but somewhere along the way I became one and I think it’s because I actually like my routine now. Waking up naturally before my 6AM alarm, not looking at my phone, doing my morning pages for at least 30 minutes while my dog, Dude, cuddles up next to me (I usually use his body as my journaling table, lol). Then coffee from my favorite little machine, and diving into my to-do list. It feels like a sacred, separate part of the day all on its own.
Evenings, I would argue, can be even better.
Whether you work from home, from an office, run your own business, or are deep in the chaos of motherhood, I think we all hit that 3PM wall where the brain simply cannot handle one more major task or big decision. So we wrap up the final to-dos, and then around 5PM, we collectively close the laptop / lock up the storefront, and step into the next portion of our day.
The magical evening hours.
4PM — Golden Hour Walk
I wrote in my piece How to Make Your Weekdays Feel Like Weekends that this walk can be the thing that truly separates the workday from your evening. Instead of immediately collapsing on the couch and scrolling, you pour a little glass of vino (here’s my favorite to-go cup), step outside, notice the new spring blooms, wave to your neighbors, breathe some fresh air. Your day is just beginning. Shake off whatever weight the last eight hours put on you. I personally love the visual of wringing the day out like a wet towel.
5PM — Mise en Place
Probably my favorite part of the day, a happy hour of sorts. I put on a playlist (jazz house, quiet luxury, something upbeat, but not too crazy) and I start prepping for dinner. I’ve always said that chopping herbs and veg is the single best way for me to fully switch off work mode. There’s something about the rhythm and mindlessness of it. Pour a little drink, get everything prepped, listen to something vibey, start cooking, and the evening takes on a whole new life.
Bonus if you change your clothes. Nothing fancy. A flowy nightgown, your favorite sweatshirt, linen pants, whatever makes you feel like a person who is officially off the clock. Something new from the day, even if you were already in a comfy sweater and sweats. And the real trick, an apron. I don't know why, but an apron makes me feel cute and happy. Try it.
6PM — Dinner at the Table
This one is hard, but worth it… let’s try not to eat on the couch.
We’ve been making a real effort to sit at our island or dining table, and the difference is (sorry to say it) very noticeable. A playlist in the background, plates actually set out, a pitcher of water, maybe a bottle of something nice and no phones. It automatically becomes a more elevated experience and changes the course of the evening.
Growing up, my family sat at the dining table every single night. We all went around and shared our “highs and lows” of the day, even our parents’ little stresses were shared. I attribute our closeness to those moments. When everyone knows what the others are dealing with, it creates so much more grace. And it allows for more celebratory moments too! We can cheers to a great meeting or an A on a test. It’s a tradition I plan on doing with our daughter.
7PM — A Future Self Treat
Okay, stay with me. I just told you to eat at the table, and now I’m suggesting you still don’t turn on the TV. But don’t worry, you can now move to the couch. This hour is just for you.
Do something your future self will thank you for. I love this window for writing on Substack (it’s currently 6:55PM as I write this), working on a needlepoint project, doing a puzzle while listening to an audiobook, calling a friend, playing cards. Sometimes it can be an intentional movie night too.
I call it a “future self treat” because there’s something very satisfying about picking up a project you left off the night before and seeing the daily progress. Watching your Substack list grow because you’ve been putting in the hours. Learning something slowly that you’ll officially be great at in a year. Watching your Ina Garden needlepoint fill in, lol.
In our house, we don’t turn on the TV most nights, and it makes the evenings feel so much longer and honestly, so much more fun. The hours don’t disappear into an endless scroll or putting your brain in fight or flight by watching the latest cult documentary.
This stretch doesn’t need to be remotely productive, BUT it should fill your cup. Have a friend come over for a post-dinner drink or dessert. Take the time to sit outside and watch the sunset. Flip through a magazine. Something that enriches your life and doesn’t steal from it.
And if you're in a season of life where 7PM means bathtime and bedtime stories, your version of this might look like 15 quiet minutes after the kids go down. That counts just as much.
8:30PM — The Spa Moment
Dry brush. Shower or bath. Brush your teeth. Do your skincare. I love putting on spa music or a meditation during this part of the evening to calm my nervous system in these last hours of the day.
I also use this time to for some evening gratitude. While going through my skincare routine, I’ll mentally list the things I’m proud of, even on the worst of days. “I’m proud I woke up and made my bed.” “I’m proud of the way I showed up in that meeting.” “I’m proud I went on a walk tonight instead of scrolling.” “I’m proud that I’m currently taking the time to take care of myself.” Showing appreciation for yourself (and others) and for what you accomplished will set you up for a much better night’s rest and probably a better life in general.
9PM — Turn Down Service
You know I love a turn down service. Set up your bedroom for a dreamy night. Fold and put away the pile of clothes on the chair, light a candle or some incense, crack a window for a final clear out of stale air, fluff your pillows, put your water on the nightstand. I love doing gua sha and a meditation in bed, some light stretching too. The goal is that your room feels like like the final oasis.
And if your brain is still stressin’ thinking about an incomplete to-do list, pull out your journal and write it all down. A Baylor University study found that people who spent just five minutes writing out tomorrow’s tasks before bed fell asleep an average of nine minutes faster. The physical act of offloading the list from your mind to paper is genuinely one of the most effective sleep tools there is.
Then, time to read. A few chapters usually puts me right out. I’ve woken up more than once with my Kindle still in my hand. If sleep doesn’t come right away, I’ll put on a meditation or quietly run through a mental gratitude list as I drift off.
10:30PM — Sleep
Rest up, buttercup. You have a beautiful morning routine waiting for you.
That’s at least five good hours after a 9-to-5.
It’s so easy to come home, put on sweats, and scroll until you fall asleep and start the whole thing over again the next day. And some nights, that’s exactly what you need, truly. Does every single one of these steps happen every single night for me? Absolutely not. But even one or two of these can shift the whole feeling of an evening.
Make a small list of things you could swap in: a walk, a sunset, a new recipe, something you want to learn, a friend at the table.
Life is made up of your daily habits, and our evenings have so much more to offer. The good life doesn't have to wait for the weekend. It can start precisely at 5PM.
xx,
P.K.
As a mother of three with a newborn, I gave myself permission to sit outside with a cold glass of wine and enjoy the spring breeze with a sweet babe in my lap and the kids playing outside…all because of this article! I needed a little push to elevate the so called “witching hours”. 🤍 Thank you!
i've been doing something similar for months now and i swear to you it completely changed the way i look at my days. and i love using a walk as a 'commute', since i work from home. i usually do one with my dog right before i start the workday at 9am and another right after i finish, at 5pm. it makes all the different for me and, like you said, helps me unload the day and just relax.